Question: Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular ...
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It is argued by peoplesome that among environmental issues, the loss of certain animals and plants is of paramount importance. While, while others believe there are more considerablesignificant matters compared to the previous category.Nowadays, there are some particular species are suffering from environmentally harmful practices. For instance, water contamination by factories poisons a vast majority of fisheriesfish and other aquatic animals. Or some certain types of plants cannot adapt to the changes brought by climate change or global warming. As a matter of fact, these species can be related topart of a food-chain, and their absence in the chain might finallyeventually affect humans as well.Nevertheless, the extinction of species, who were not able unableto cope with difficulties, is a natural phenomenon from thousands of years ago. InfactIn fact, the devastation of other features is more significant and decisive for sustaining the environment. Two common examples whichthat spring to mind are the expansion of the hole of Ozonein the ozone layer and the reduction of consumable water. Indeed, the impacts of these issues are indispensablecritical, and thereimmediate action must be immediate actions carried out takento inhibitprevent the intensificationworsening of circumstancesconditions on which all the lives depend onlife depends.I agree there are vital environmental problems that can puthave severe impacts on a significant number of livingsliving beings, especially humans. Therefore, coping with addressingthem hastakes priority toover any other problems, including the loss of certain species.In conclusion, each animal or plant has theirits own value, and their loss of them can be influential to environmetthe environment and other livingsliving beings. However, there are more considerable isuues whichissues that are in connection with connected toa broader papulationpopulation of creatures, and solving them comes at the first stage.
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Task Achievement
You have addressed both views and provided your own opinion, which meets the task requirements.
The introduction clearly presents the two opposing views, and the body paragraphs discuss each perspective.
However, some arguments could be more developed. For example, the discussion on ozone layer depletion and water scarcity is quite brief and lacks specific examples or deeper analysis.
The conclusion summarizes the discussion but could be more impactful by reinforcing your stance more strongly.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing species loss to other environmental problems feels abrupt.
Minor grammatical errors (e.g., "Infact" should be "In fact," "isuues" should be "issues") slightly disrupt the flow.
Repetition of phrases like "certain species" could be varied for better lexical resource.
Lexical Resource
You use a range of vocabulary (e.g., "paramount importance," "devastation," "indispensable"), but some word choices are awkward or incorrect (e.g., "who were not able to cope with difficulties" – "which" would be more appropriate for species).
Some phrases could be more natural (e.g., "a broader papulation of creatures" → "a broader population of species").
Spelling errors (e.g., "papulation," "isuues") should be corrected.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There are several grammatical errors:
Subject-verb agreement: "loss of certain animals and plants is of paramount importance" (correct) vs. "species who were not able to cope" (should be "which").
Article usage: "a food-chain" → "the food chain."
Prepositions: "in connection with" → "connected to."
Sentence structure: Some sentences are awkwardly phrased (e.g., "Two common examples which spring to mind are expansion of hole of Ozone layer" → "Two common examples are the expansion of the ozone layer and the reduction of consumable water.").
More complex sentence structures (e.g., conditional clauses, passive voice) would improve variety.
Suggestions for Improvement
Expand key arguments with more specific examples (e.g., how ozone depletion affects humans directly).
Improve transitions between paragraphs for smoother flow.
Proofread carefully to correct grammar and spelling errors.
Vary vocabulary to avoid repetition (e.g., "significant" is overused).
Clarify phrasing for better readability (e.g., "devastation of other features" could be "destruction of other environmental factors").
Overall, the essay is well-structured and addresses the prompt, but refining grammar, vocabulary, and argument depth would strengthen it further.