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Question: Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular ...

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It is argued among some people that nowadays, the most important of enviromentalenvironmental problems is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others believe that there are more important environmental issues. While I accept that the extinction of animals and plants is one of the most important problems, I believe that there are more important environmental problems which I will argue them discuss below. On the one hand, it is believed by some people that the loss of particular species of plants and animals would be the most important environmental problem. They believe this, for two main reasons: Firstly, the continuingsurvival of humans' lives isn't possible without the existanceexistence of many speceisspecies of animals. For instance, the existanceexistence of a particular type of insectsinsect is essential for agricultural activities. Secondly, by the extinction of many types of plants, conditionconditions will be highly difficult for producing food products, foras almost the production of all types of food products depends on plants. forFor example, the greangreen-tea production can not cannot be continued without the existence of a special type of plant. On the other hand, there are many types of environmental problems that are more essential than the loss of particular species of plants and animals. I believe that air polution that pollution, produced by factories or muchines traffic, is the most important of our environmental issues. air polutionAir pollution causes many types of diseasediseases for humans. Many types of heart, breathing, skin, and eyeseye diseases are created beacausebecause of air polutionpollution. For instance, the city of tehranTehran is one of the most pulluted city all around polluted cities in the world, and therefore most people are bothering suffer from a wide ragerange of diseases; by contrast, cities without a lot of pullotion much pollution have the lowest number of sick people. Water pollution is the other another dangerous problem. The pollution of water can easily influence on the health condition of humans. For instance, people who live in villages have lessfewer diseases related to stomachethe stomach, like stomachacestomachaches. In conclusion, I believe that nowadays, we have more important environmental problems than the loss of particular species of plants and animals; however, extictionthe extinction of plants and animalanimals is highly important.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
It is argued among some people that nowadays, the most important of enviromental problems is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others believe that there more important environmental issues. While I accept that the extinction of animals and plants is one the most important problems, I believe that there are more important environmental problems which I will argue them below.
It is argued among some people that the most pressing environmental issue today is the loss of certain species of plants and animals, while others believe there are more significant concerns. Although I acknowledge that species extinction is a critical problem, I contend that other environmental issues are more urgent, as I will discuss below.
On the one hand, it is believed by some people that the loss of particular species of plants and animals would be the most important environmental problem. They believe this, for two main reasons: Firstly, the continuing of humans' lives isn't possible without the existance of many speceis of animals. For instance, the existance of a particular type of insects is essential for agricultural activities. Secondly, by extinction of many types of plants, condition will be highly difficult for producing food products, for almost the production all types of food products depends on plants. for example, the grean-tea production can not be continued without the existence of a special type of plant.
On the one hand, some argue that the disappearance of specific plant and animal species is the most serious environmental problem. They justify this view for two main reasons. First, human survival depends on the existence of various animal species. For example, certain insects are essential for agricultural productivity. Second, the extinction of many plant species would severely disrupt food production, as nearly all food products rely on plants. For instance, green tea production would be impossible without a specific plant species.
On the other hand, there are many types of environmental problems that are more essential than the loss of particular species of plants and animals. I believe that air polution that produced by factories or muchines traffic, is the most important of our environmental issues. air polution causes many types of disease for humans. Many types of heart, breathing, skin and eyes diseases are created beacause of air polution. For instance, the city of tehran is one of the most pulluted city all around the world, therefore most people are bothering from a wide rage of diseases; by contrast, cities without a lot of pullotion have the lowest number of sick people. Water pollution is the other dangerous problem. The pollution of water can easily influence on the health condition of humans. For instance, people who live in villages have less diseases related to stomache like stomachace.
On the other hand, I believe environmental problems such as air and water pollution are more critical than species loss. Air pollution, caused by factories and vehicular emissions, is one of the most severe issues, as it leads to numerous health problems, including respiratory, cardiovascular, and skin diseases. For example, Tehran, one of the most polluted cities globally, has a high incidence of pollution-related illnesses, whereas cleaner cities report fewer health issues. Water pollution is equally dangerous, directly affecting human health. People in rural areas, for instance, suffer fewer stomach-related illnesses due to cleaner water sources.
In conclusion, I believe that nowadays, we have more important environmental problems than the loss of particular species of plants and animals; however, extiction of plants and animal is highly important.
In conclusion, while the extinction of plants and animals is undoubtedly important, I believe that air and water pollution pose greater threats to humanity today.
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Check your essay for this topic
Overall Band Score
5.5
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
weak
Grammar Accuracy
weak
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
strong
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Your essay addresses both views and presents your own opinion, which meets the task requirements.
  • The introduction clearly states the two perspectives and your stance, which is good.
  • However, some arguments could be more developed. For example, while you mention air and water pollution as more important issues, you could provide stronger evidence or more specific examples to support these claims.
  • The conclusion restates your opinion but could be more concise and impactful.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphs for each viewpoint and your opinion.
  • Some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For example, phrases like "for two main reasons" help, but linking words like furthermore, moreover, or in contrast could improve flow.
  • Repetition of phrases like "the loss of particular species of plants and animals" could be reduced by using synonyms or pronouns.

Lexical Resource

  • There is a good range of vocabulary, but some words are misspelled (polution instead of pollution, speceis instead of species, machines instead of machines).
  • Some word choices are awkward ("the continuing of humans' lives" could be "human survival").
  • More precise vocabulary (e.g., biodiversity loss instead of loss of species) would strengthen your argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • There are several grammatical errors:
    • "there more important environmental issues" → "there are more important..."
    • "which I will argue them below" → "which I will discuss below" (remove them)
    • "the existance of many speceis" → "the existence of many species"
    • "condition will be highly difficult" → "conditions will become extremely difficult"
    • "air polution that produced by factories" → "air pollution that is produced by factories"
  • Some sentences are overly long and could be split for clarity.
  • Work on subject-verb agreement ("the city of tehran is one of the most pulluted city" → "Tehran is one of the most polluted cities").

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Proofread for spelling and grammar – Use tools like Grammarly or ask a native speaker to review your work.
  2. Vary sentence structures – Mix simple and complex sentences to improve fluency.
  3. Strengthen examples – Provide more concrete data (e.g., statistics on pollution-related diseases).
  4. Use synonyms – Avoid repeating the same phrases.
  5. Make the conclusion sharper – Instead of restating, summarize key points more effectively.

Overall, your essay has a strong structure and addresses the prompt well, but refining grammar, vocabulary, and argument depth will help improve clarity and impact. Keep practicing!