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Question: Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular ...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
it is believed that the most crucial environmental problem in today's world is the extinction of important species. others believe there are much more important obstacles to tend to. the second group areis emphasizing on general treatsthreats to the planet. in contrast, the first group believebelieves that preserving each speciespecies is a small gesture with great benefits. although both points of viewsview seem eligiblevalid, my opinion alignaligns more with secondsthe second view. on the one hand, it is believed that our planet is suffering from major issues that require immediate actionsaction and the lives of individual creatures might be unimportant comparecompared to them. human destructive behavior has damaged the environment noticeably and it will bring us to a point that makes uswhere we are unable to repair it. for instance, cutting down trees ofin tropical jungles inon a large scale and the significant increase in carbon dioxide emissions hadhave resulted in global warming and climate changeschange. on the other hand, some people think that to preserve nature, small steps should be taken and saving a few particular endangered animalanimals or planetplants is a much easier and more intellectual move. there are some key creatures in any habitat that losing them whose loss will hurt its foundation. all species are living live in food chains and the loss of a lowlower member will disturb others. moreover, some animals and plants are providing provide a suitable atmosphere to live in bythrough their actions and have domino effects on others' lives. for example, one of them areis beavers, that which by making dams on rivers, slow the water flewflow and let other animalanimals drink the water much easiermore easily and make their nests and homes around the water. in conclusion, necessary measures must be taken in matter of regarding large global problems and it isn't wise to just attend to savefocus on saving pre-extinction species. however, I believe some animals are extremely important and should be considered as key members of the planet. therefore, we shouldn't lose focus on them just to just look at the big picture.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
it is believed that the most crucial environmental problem in today's world is the extinction of important species. others believe there much more important obstacles to tend to. the second group are emphasizing on general treats to the planet. in contrast, the first group believe that preserving each specie is a small gesture with great benefits. although both points of views seem eligible, my opinion align more with seconds view.
It is believed that the most critical environmental problem in today's world is the extinction of important species. Others argue that there are far more pressing issues to address. The second group emphasizes broader threats to the planet, while the first group maintains that preserving each species is a small but impactful gesture. Although both perspectives have merit, my opinion aligns more closely with the latter view.
on the one hand, it is believed that our planet is suffering from major issues that require immediate actions and lives of individual creatures might be unimportant compare to them. human destructive behavior damaged environment noticeably and it will bring us to a point that makes us unable to repair it. for instance, cutting down trees of tropical jungles in a large scale and significant increase in carbon dioxide emissions had resulted in global warming and climate changes.
On the one hand, our planet faces major environmental crises that demand immediate action, making the survival of individual species seem insignificant in comparison. Human activities have caused severe damage to the environment, pushing it toward irreversible decline. For instance, large-scale deforestation and the dramatic rise in carbon emissions have led to global warming and climate change, posing existential threats to ecosystems worldwide.
on the other hand, some people think that to preserve nature small steps should be taken and saving a few particular endangered animal or planet is a much easier and more intellectual move. there are some key creatures in any habitat that losing them will hurt its foundation. all species are living in food chains and loss of a low member will disturb others. moreover, some animals and plants are providing a suitable atmosphere to live in by their actions and have domino effects on others' lives. for example, one of them are beavers that by making dams on rivers, slow the water flew and let other animal drink the water much easier and make their nests and homes around the water.
On the other hand, some argue that protecting nature requires incremental efforts, and safeguarding specific endangered species is a practical and strategic approach. Certain species play pivotal roles in their habitats, and their loss could destabilize entire ecosystems. All species are interconnected through food chains, and the disappearance of even a minor member can disrupt others. Additionally, some animals and plants actively sustain their environments, creating conditions that support other life forms. For example, beavers construct dams that slow water flow, providing easier access to water for other animals and creating habitats around these water sources.
in conclusion, necessary measures must be taken in matter of large global problems and it isn't wise to just attend to save pre-extinction species. however, I believe some animals are extremely important and should considered as key members of the planet. therefore, we shouldn't lose focus on them to just look at the big picture.
In conclusion, while urgent action is needed to address large-scale global issues, it would be unwise to neglect the protection of endangered species. I believe that certain animals are indispensable to the planet’s balance and should be prioritized. Therefore, we must not lose sight of their importance while focusing on broader environmental challenges.
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Check your essay for this topic
Overall Band Score
5.5
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
weak
Grammar Accuracy
weak
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
average
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Your essay addresses both views and presents your own opinion, which meets the task requirements. However, the introduction could be clearer in outlining the two perspectives.
  • Some arguments are well-developed (e.g., deforestation and global warming, the role of keystone species like beavers), but others could be more detailed.
  • The conclusion summarizes your stance but could be more concise and directly tied to the arguments presented.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay has a logical structure, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Phrases like "on the one hand" and "on the other hand" help, but some sentences feel abrupt.
  • Repetition of "for example" weakens cohesion—vary your linking words (e.g., "such as," "for instance," "as an illustration").
  • The conclusion could better synthesize the discussion rather than introducing a new idea ("key members of the planet").

Lexical Resource

  • There are some spelling and word choice errors:
    • "obstacles to tend to" → "issues to address"
    • "general treats" → "general threats"
    • "pre-extinction species" → "endangered species"
  • Some phrasing is awkward or unclear:
    • "my opinion align more with seconds view" → "my opinion aligns more with the second view"
    • "human destructive behavior damaged environment noticeably" → "Human destructive behavior has significantly damaged the environment"
  • Use more precise vocabulary (e.g., "keystone species" instead of "key creatures").

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • Several grammatical errors affect clarity:
    • Subject-verb agreement: "others believe there much more important obstacles" → "others believe there are much more important obstacles"
    • Article misuse: "the first group believe" → "the first group believes"
    • Tense inconsistency: "human destructive behavior damaged" → "has damaged"
    • Missing words: "should considered as key members" → "should be considered as key members"
  • Sentence structure could be more varied (e.g., more complex sentences for higher-level grammar).

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Clarify the introduction – Clearly state both views in a more structured way.
  2. Improve transitions – Use a wider range of linking words to connect ideas smoothly.
  3. Proofread for grammar and spelling – Pay attention to articles, verb agreement, and word forms.
  4. Expand key arguments – Provide more specific examples or data where possible.
  5. Refine the conclusion – Restate your position more succinctly without introducing new points.

Overall, your essay presents a balanced discussion but would benefit from clearer expression and stronger grammatical control. Keep practicing!