Balang
  • Home
  • Speaking
  • Blog
lemon logo
Balang is committed to revolutionizing language learning, empowering individuals worldwide to achieve their aspirations through innovative technology and personalized education.
Terms of ServicePrivacy PolicyRefund Policy
Contact
Email
telegram logo
Telegram

Question: In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. W...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
In some notionscases, individuals prefer to buy a property instead of renting it. This tendency can be due to inflation and an aging population, and although some feel that this trend is a negative alterationchange, I firmly believe that it is a positive trendone. There are some fundamental reasons why people in some particular certain countries have a tendency to own a home rather than being a renterrent one. The first reason is an increasing inflation, leading to decreasingdecreased purchasing power among the population. The more financial crisiscrises exist in communities, the more people may experience difficulties in affording struggle to afford their basic needs and demands. As a result, people prefer to buy a home, enabling them to be more financially secure in the future. Another reason is an aging population, findingwho find moving from one house to another one too challenging. The oldelderly are usually interested in living in one home for athe long runterm, givingallowing them the opportunity to avoid transferring their heavy possessions on a regular basis. Consequently, some countries with an aging population have more demandsdemand for buying accommodations apart fromrather than renting them. I would argue that purchasing a home is a positive situation as it provides individuals with the chance to have moregreater satisfaction, leading to a better quality of life. As people are no longer are obligated to move regularly, they would experinceexperience more tranquility, resulting in having more time to allocatededicate to their leisure activities and being far happier. What is more, people would be able to save more money when they are not under anthe obligation to rent a house. Since renters shouldmust spend some of their income on renting a home, owning a property allows them to save these expendituresexpenses in order to tackle any probablepotential financial issues. To sum up, inhabitants in some countries are keen to be a home owner homeowners rather than renting one renters to secure their financial lives and avoid constant moving. I strongly believe that this trend is beneficial because of boostingit boosts an individual's quality of life and savingsaves money.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
In some notions, individuals prefer to buy a property instead of renting it. This tendency can be due to inflation and aging population, and although some feel that this trend is a negative alteration, I firmly believe that it is a positive trend.
In some countries, individuals prefer to buy property rather than rent it. This tendency can be attributed to inflation and an aging population. Although some argue that this trend has negative consequences, I firmly believe it is a positive development.
There are some fundamental reasons why people in some particular countries have a tendency to own a home rather than being a renter. The first reason is an increasing inflation, leading to decreasing purchasing power among population. The more financial crisis exist in communities, the more people may experience difficulties in affording their basic needs and demands. As a result, people prefer to buy a home, enabling them to be more financially secure in the future. Another reason is aging population, finding moving from one house to another one too challenging. The old are usually interested in living in one home for a long run, giving them the opportunity to avoid transferring their heavy possessions on a regular basis. Consequently, some countries with an aging population have more demands for buying accommodations apart from renting them.
There are several key reasons why people in certain countries tend to own homes instead of renting. The first reason is rising inflation, which reduces purchasing power. As financial crises become more common, people struggle to afford basic necessities, making homeownership an attractive option for long-term financial security. Another reason is the aging population, as older individuals often find moving between houses challenging. They prefer to settle in one home permanently, avoiding the hassle of relocating their belongings frequently. Consequently, countries with aging populations see higher demand for homeownership over renting.
I would argue that purchasing a home is a positive situation as provides individuals with the chance to have more satisfaction, leading to better quality of life. As people no longer are obligated to move regularly, they would experince more tranquility, resulting in having more time to allocate to their leisure activities and being far happier. What is more, people would be able to save more money when they are not under an obligation to rent a house. Since renters should spend some of their income on renting a home, owning a property allows them to save these expenditures in order to tackle any probable financial issues.
I argue that purchasing a home is beneficial because it increases personal satisfaction and improves quality of life. Without the need to move frequently, individuals experience greater stability, allowing them to dedicate more time to leisure activities and overall happiness. Additionally, homeowners can save money by avoiding recurring rental expenses, enabling them to allocate funds toward other financial needs.
To sum up, inhabitants in some countries are keen to be a home owner rather than renting one to secure their financial lives and avoid constant moving. I strongly believe that this trend is beneficial because of boosting individual's quality of life and saving money.
In conclusion, people in some countries prefer homeownership to renting for financial security and stability. I strongly believe this trend is advantageous, as it enhances quality of life and promotes long-term savings.
See more samples for this topic
Check your essay for this topic
Overall Band Score
7
Overview
Vocabulary Range
strong
Linking Words
average
Spelling
strong
Grammar Accuracy
average
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
strong
Task Response
strong
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Your essay addresses the prompt effectively, discussing reasons why homeownership is important in some countries and presenting a clear opinion on whether this is positive or negative.
  • The reasons (inflation and aging population) are relevant and well-explained, though you could strengthen the connection between inflation and homeownership by providing more specific examples or data.
  • Your position (positive) is clearly stated and supported with logical arguments (financial security, quality of life, and savings). However, the conclusion could be more nuanced—acknowledging potential drawbacks (e.g., housing market instability, debt risks) would make your argument more balanced.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphing (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion).
  • Some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For example:
    • "The first reason is an increasing inflation, leading to decreasing purchasing power among population." → Consider rephrasing for clarity: "The first reason is rising inflation, which reduces people's purchasing power."
    • "What is more, people would be able to save more money..." → A stronger transition like "Furthermore" or "Additionally" would improve flow.
  • Repetition of phrases like "financial security" and "quality of life" could be varied for better lexical resource.

Lexical Resource

  • You use a good range of vocabulary (e.g., "tendency," "financial crisis," "tranquility," "expenditures"). However, some word choices are awkward or incorrect:
    • "Notions" should be "countries" or "nations."
    • "Financial crisis exist" → "Financial crises exist."
    • "The old" → "Elderly people" (more natural phrasing).
  • Some sentences could be more concise:
    • "The more financial crisis exist in communities, the more people may experience difficulties in affording their basic needs and demands." → "As financial crises worsen, people struggle to afford basic necessities."

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • There are several grammatical errors that affect clarity:
    • Subject-verb agreement: "The more financial crisis exist" → "crises exist."
    • Article misuse: "an increasing inflation" → "increasing inflation" (no article needed).
    • Tense consistency: "The old are usually interested in living in one home for a long run, giving them the opportunity to avoid transferring their heavy possessions on a regular basis." → "Elderly people often prefer to live in one home long-term, avoiding the hassle of moving their belongings frequently."
  • Some sentences are overly complex and could be simplified for better readability.

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Balance your argument: Acknowledge potential downsides of homeownership (e.g., mortgage debt, market risks) to strengthen your position.
  2. Improve transitions: Use linking words more effectively (e.g., "Moreover," "Consequently," "On the other hand").
  3. Proofread for grammar: Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, articles, and sentence structure.
  4. Vary vocabulary: Avoid repetition and use synonyms where possible.

Overall, your essay is well-structured and addresses the prompt, but refining grammar, word choice, and argument balance would enhance clarity and coherence. Keep practicing!