Balang
  • Home
  • Speaking
  • Blog
lemon logo
Balang is committed to revolutionizing language learning, empowering individuals worldwide to achieve their aspirations through innovative technology and personalized education.
Terms of ServicePrivacy PolicyRefund Policy
Contact
Email
telegram logo
Telegram

Question: Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required ...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
There is an opposing view on whether the people who have studied certain fields, including medicine and engineering, should occupywork in the country where they have trained or they should be free to work where ever wherever they desire. This essay will examine both perspectives, and explain why I strongly agree with the latter viewpoint. To begin with, a number of people argue that authorities should ask specialists such as doctors and engineers to stay in the nation where they have persued pursued their educationseducation, as they think not only a large number of facilities, but also a huge amount of budget havehas been dedicated to them. As a result, these professionals have to stay and serve the residents of that country. Furthermore, it is believed that the contentscontent and lessons which are toughttaught in other regions, will not be practical in their own country. For example, several countries, , namely the USA and Canada, do not accept educational contents ofcontent from other nations, since those trainings are not up-to-date and there are some differences in the curriculum of various educatianaleducational systems. On the other hand, a vast majority of individuals believe that people should not be limited to workworking in specific areas. Although countries usually provide the high -quality education for qualified people, students often pay for thatit. In addition, sometimes, these educated people find that country an inappropriate areaplace to make a living. ThereforTherefore, they might prefer to go overseas in order to find better opportunities. For instance, many peopelpeople in Iran tend to migrate to other countries to achieve both job perks and pay parity in payment. In conclusion, while many think specialists have to stay in the place of their univesitiesuniversities, becuasebecause the goverment offerdgovernment offered some facilities to them, others, minemyself included, believe it is not fair, because the professionals have the right to choose their own occupationalcareer paths.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
There is an opposing view on whether the people who have studied certain fields, including medicine and engineering, should occupy in the country where they have trained or they should be free to work where ever they desire. This essay will examine both perspectives, and explain why I strongly agree with the latter viewpoint.
There is a debate regarding whether professionals in fields such as medicine and engineering should remain in the country where they received their training or be free to work wherever they choose. This essay will examine both perspectives and explain why I strongly support the latter viewpoint.
To begin with, a number of people argue that authorities should ask specialists such as doctors and engineers to stay in the nation they have persued their educations, as they think not only a large number of facilities, but also a huge amount of budget have been dedicated to them. As a result, these professionals have to stay and serve the residents of that country. Furthermore, it is believed that the contents and lessons which are tought in other regions, will not be practical in their own country. For example, several countries ,namely the USA and Canada, do not accept educational contents of other nations, since those trainings are not up-to-date and there are some differences in the curriculum of various educatianal systems.
To begin with, some argue that specialists like doctors and engineers should stay in the country where they were educated, as significant resources and funding have been invested in their training. Consequently, they believe these professionals have an obligation to serve the local population. Additionally, some contend that curricula and training methods vary across countries, making foreign education less applicable elsewhere. For example, nations like the USA and Canada often do not recognize qualifications from certain countries due to differences in educational standards and outdated coursework.
On the other hand, a vast majority of individuals believe that people should not be limited to work in specific areas. Although countries usually provide the high quality education for qualified people, students often pay for that. In addition, sometimes, these educated people find that country an inappropriate area to make a living. Therefor, they might prefer to go overseas in order to find better opportunities. For instance, many peopel in Iran tend to migrate to other countries to achieve both job perks and parity in payment.
On the other hand, many believe individuals should not be restricted in their career choices. While governments may provide high-quality education, students often bear the financial burden themselves. Moreover, some professionals may find limited opportunities or unfavorable conditions in their home country, leading them to seek better prospects abroad. For instance, many skilled workers in Iran choose to emigrate to access higher salaries and improved working conditions.
In conclusion, while many think specialists have to stay in the place of their univesities, becuase the goverment offerd some facilities to them, others, mine included, believe it is not fair, because the professionals have the right to choose their own occupational paths.
In conclusion, although some argue that professionals should remain in their home country due to government investment in their education, I firmly believe they should have the freedom to pursue opportunities globally, as career choices are a fundamental right.
See more samples for this topic
Check your essay for this topic
Overall Band Score
6.5
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
weak
Grammar Accuracy
average
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
strong
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Your essay addresses both views and presents your opinion, which meets the task requirements. However, the argument could be more balanced. The first viewpoint (professionals should stay in their home country) is explained, but the supporting examples (USA and Canada not accepting foreign education) are not entirely convincing or well-developed.
  • Your opinion is clear, but the reasoning could be strengthened with more specific examples or data to support why professionals should have the freedom to work abroad.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother.
  • Some sentences are awkwardly phrased, making the flow less natural (e.g., "the people who have studied certain fields, including medicine and engineering, should occupy in the country"). Rephrasing for clarity would help.
  • The conclusion restates your position but could summarize the key arguments more effectively.

Lexical Resource

  • There are some spelling and word choice errors (e.g., "persued" instead of "pursued," "tought" instead of "taught," "peopel" instead of "people"). Proofreading would help.
  • Some phrases are repetitive (e.g., "a number of people argue" and "a vast majority of individuals believe"). Varying your vocabulary would improve lexical range.
  • Some expressions are unnatural (e.g., "occupy in the country" should be "work in the country").

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • There are several grammatical errors:
    • "should occupy in the country" → "should work in the country"
    • "the contents and lessons which are tought in other regions" → "the content and lessons taught in other regions"
    • "the goverment offerd some facilities" → "the government offered certain facilities"
  • Some sentences are overly complex and could be simplified for clarity.
  • Subject-verb agreement and article usage need attention (e.g., "a huge amount of budget have been dedicated" → "a huge amount of budget has been dedicated").

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Clarify and refine arguments – Provide stronger examples for both sides (e.g., brain drain vs. benefits of global mobility).
  2. Improve sentence structure – Avoid awkward phrasing and ensure grammatical accuracy.
  3. Expand vocabulary – Use synonyms and more precise terms to avoid repetition.
  4. Proofread carefully – Correct spelling and grammar mistakes to enhance readability.

Overall, your essay presents a clear position and structure, but refining language use and argumentation would make it stronger. Keep practicing!