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Question: In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. W...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
In some countries, it is crucial to purchase a home rather than rent one. This is because buying a home in some countries is a sign of success and is a long-term financial investment. I contend this is a positive situation due to some compelling reasons that I will mention in this essay. To begin with, there are several reasons why being a homeowner is important in some nations. First of all, it can be a long-term financial investment and provide potential profits for people. That is to say, if people live in their own house, they will not pay annual rent, leading to financial security for them, especially when the property value increases. For example, some people purchase a house, and if it becomes more valuable, they can sell it and make a profit, resulting in a sense of success and belonging. Secondly, homeowners can modify their living spaces; they can redesign or rebuild them, which is often restricted in rental properties. Moreover, I believe that trying to live as a homeowner can bring a positive circumstancesituation. This is because it will help people to strive more in their lives. In other words, the more people try to buy a home, the more they attempt to work for earningto earn money, making them improve their productivity and efficiency. For instance, if people prioritize purchasing a house, they will definitely attempt to save more money and tighten their belts, leading to increased resilience and capability. In conclusion, in some countries, it is very essential for people to be homeowners rather than renting. Owing, owing? to the potential benefits for residents. In addition, I firmly believe that this is a useful conditionsituation because it will make citizens have more endeavourdriven, which provides them with a sense of satisfaction.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
In some countries, it is crucial to purchase a home rather than rent one. This is because buying a home in some countries is a sign of success and is a long-term financial investment. I contend this is a positive situation due to some compelling reasons that I will mention in this essay.
In some countries, owning a home is considered more advantageous than renting. This is because purchasing property is often viewed as a sign of achievement and a sound long-term investment. I believe this is a positive trend for several compelling reasons, which I will discuss in this essay.
To begin with, there are several reasons why being a homeowner is important in some nations. First of all, it can be a long-term financial investment and provide potential profits for people. That is to say, if people live in their own house, they will not pay annual rent, leading to financial security for them, especially when the property value increases. For example, some people purchase a house, and if it becomes more valuable, they can sell it and make a profit, resulting in a sense of success and belonging. Secondly, homeowners can modify their living spaces; they can redesign or rebuild them, which is often restricted in rental properties.
To begin with, homeownership offers significant benefits in certain nations. Firstly, it serves as a long-term financial asset with potential for profit. Unlike renting, where money is spent without return, owning a home eliminates recurring rental expenses and can yield financial gains if property values rise. For example, homeowners who sell their properties at a higher price than the purchase cost can secure substantial profits, fostering both financial stability and a sense of accomplishment. Secondly, homeowners have the freedom to modify their living spaces, unlike renters, who often face restrictions on renovations.
Moreover, I believe that trying to live as a homeowner can bring a positive circumstance. This is because it will help people to strive more in their lives. In other words, the more people try to buy a home, the more they attempt to work for earning money, making them improve their productivity and efficiency. For instance, if people prioritize purchasing a house, they will definitely attempt to save more money and tighten their belts, leading to increased resilience and capability.
Furthermore, I argue that striving for homeownership can have a positive impact on individuals. It encourages greater effort and financial discipline, as people work harder to save for a property. For instance, those prioritizing homeownership are likely to adopt better saving habits and increase their productivity to achieve this goal, ultimately enhancing their resilience and financial management skills.
In conclusion, in some countries, it is very essential for people to be homeowners rather than renting. Owing, owing? to the potential benefits for residents. In addition, I firmly believe that this is a useful condition because it will make citizens have more endeavour, which provides them with a sense of satisfaction.
In conclusion, in certain countries, owning a home is far more beneficial than renting due to its financial advantages and personal fulfillment. Additionally, I strongly believe that this trend motivates individuals to work harder, fostering a greater sense of satisfaction and achievement.
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Overall Band Score
7
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
weak
Grammar Accuracy
average
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
strong
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Strengths:

    • You addressed both parts of the prompt effectively, explaining why homeownership is important in some countries and presenting a clear opinion (positive).
    • Your arguments are supported with relevant examples (property value increase, financial security, and motivation to work harder).
    • The essay meets the minimum word requirement and maintains focus on the topic.
  • Areas for Improvement:

    • The conclusion is somewhat repetitive and could be more concise. Instead of restating the same points, summarize your stance more clearly.
    • The phrase "Owing, owing? to the potential benefits for residents" appears to be a typo or repetition—proofreading would help avoid such errors.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • Strengths:

    • The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphing (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion).
    • Transition words (To begin with, Moreover, In conclusion) help guide the reader.
  • Areas for Improvement:

    • Some sentences could be smoother. For example: "That is to say, if people live in their own house, they will not pay annual rent, leading to financial security for them" could be rephrased for better flow: "Since homeowners do not pay rent, they achieve greater financial security."
    • The conclusion could be more cohesive—avoid abrupt shifts like "Owing, owing?"

Lexical Resource

  • Strengths:

    • You use a range of vocabulary (financial investment, resilience, capability, productivity).
    • Some good idiomatic expressions (tighten their belts, sense of belonging).
  • Areas for Improvement:

    • Avoid repetition ("long-term financial investment" is used twice in the introduction).
    • Some word choices could be more precise. For example, "useful condition" is vague—"beneficial trend" might be better.
    • Minor grammatical errors ("have more endeavour" should be "make more effort").

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • Strengths:

    • Generally good sentence structures, including complex sentences ("if people prioritize purchasing a house, they will definitely attempt to save more money").
    • Mostly correct verb tenses and subject-verb agreement.
  • Areas for Improvement:

    • Watch for small errors: "Owing, owing?" (unclear), "essential for people to be homeowners rather than renting" (should be "rather than rent").
    • Some awkward phrasing ("make citizens have more endeavour").

Final Suggestions

  • Proofread carefully to avoid typos and repetition.
  • Vary sentence structures for smoother flow.
  • Refine word choice for precision.
  • Strengthen the conclusion by summarizing key points without repetition.

Overall, a well-structured response with strong arguments—just needs minor refinements in clarity and grammar. Keep practicing!