This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
There is no doubt that universities play a crucial role in students’ success. However, while some think that college students should put all their effort and concentration into their primary majors, I agree with those who prefer not to limit their knowledge only to their main program and want to learn about other subjects.
There is no doubt that universities play a crucial role in students’ success. However, while some believe that college students should focus all their effort and concentration on their primary majors, I align with those who advocate for a broader educational experience that includes learning about other subjects.
One the one hand, focusing merely on main subjects at university can give students an opportunity to master their study. This is because as more time and energy they allocate on a specific major, there would be better results and outcome. For example, a university student who is utilized part of their time on acquiring other unrelated subjects during college’s final examination, they are more likely to perform poorly on exams in comparison to those who use all their dedication and efforts on their primary study. In contrast, if these learners try to navigate their attention into one major category, the possibility to become competent and highly qualified professional will be increased.
On the one hand, concentrating solely on main subjects at university can provide students with the opportunity to master their field of study. This is because the more time and energy they allocate to a specific major, the better their results are likely to be. For example, a university student who spends part of their time acquiring knowledge in unrelated subjects during the final examinations may perform poorly compared to those who dedicate all their efforts to their primary studies. In contrast, if these learners focus their attention on one major area, their chances of becoming competent and highly qualified professionals will increase.
On the other hand, in my view, it is vital for university students to pursue their others interests. The reason for this is that if they disregard their other passions, this might curtail their happiness and prevent them to have the impetus to drive mastery and enthusiasm to continue their paths when they encounter difficult obstacles. Moreover, increasing their knowledge about other fields might help them to have better performance in their main subjects. For instance, a computer science student who is learning about psychology, can use many of psychological lessons such as problem-solving skills and time management to improve her productivity.
On the other hand, I believe it is vital for university students to pursue their other interests. The reason for this is that neglecting their passions may curtail their happiness and diminish their motivation to achieve mastery and enthusiasm when faced with difficult challenges. Moreover, expanding their knowledge in other fields can enhance their performance in their main subjects. For instance, a computer science student who studies psychology can apply valuable lessons, such as problem-solving skills and time management, to improve her productivity.
In conclusion, although giving all our time and attention to study for major degree can enhance our overall outcome, I feel, it is important for individuals to follow their others interest, which can also help them to use this knowledge in the advantage of their main subjects.
In conclusion, although dedicating all our time and attention to studying for a major degree can enhance our overall outcomes, I feel it is important for individuals to follow their other interests, as this can also help them leverage this knowledge to benefit their primary subjects.