Writing evaluation result for: Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or... - Balang

Question: Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flyi...

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There is no denying the fact that the pollution caused by commercial airplanes is affecting the environment. While it is a commonly held belief that reducing the number of flights helps protect the environment, there is also an argument that opposes this idea. This essay will analyse this topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, when people stop flying or even reduce the number of times they fly every year, it will increase the chance of reducing the pollution. This step will force commercial airlines to figure solutions to avoid financial losses caused by people’s decisions. For example, when one company raises the price of its product, most people will take the step of boycotting it, and this will make the company reduce the price again. On the other hand, reducing the number of flights will affect the economy. It is possible to say that most sectors depend on travel, such as tourism, services, , etc. For instance, Jordan is a historical country and its economy depends heavily on tourism; when people stop flying, this will cause significant losses in theits economy of it. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to this question. On balance, however, I tend to believe that the environment is not private property and it is a matter for all people, businesses and countries in the whole world; we, and I mean both individuals and businesses, should do more sreious efortsserious efforts to protect and preserve the enviromentenvironment and naturally the globalglobe.

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Overall Band Score

6

Overview

Vocabulary Range

average

Linking Words

average

Spelling

weak

Grammar Accuracy

average

Grammar Range

average

Cohesion

average

Paragraph Structure

average

Task Response

average

Word Count

sufficient

While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Task Response: You address both sides and give a clear opinion, but ideas are underdeveloped. The analogy about boycotting prices is confusing and does not clearly explain how airlines would innovate (e.g., sustainable fuels). The economic argument relies on a single example (Jordan) without broader analysis.

Coherence & Cohesion: The structure is logical (intro, two body paragraphs, conclusion), but cohesive devices are mechanical (On one hand, On the other hand, For example). The conclusion introduces new, vague ideas ("environment is not private property") rather than summarizing your position.

Lexical Resource: Vocabulary is adequate but repetitive (reduce, stop, environment, economy). There are noticeable spelling errors (sreious, eforts, enviroment) and awkward phrasing (naturally the global).

Grammatical Range & Accuracy: You use a mix of simple and complex sentences, but errors are frequent: subject-verb agreement (it will increase the chance of reducing the pollution), article usage (the economy of it), and punctuation (comma splices in the conclusion).

Key Advice: Develop one main idea per paragraph with specific explanations (not just examples). Proofread carefully for spelling and basic grammar. Aim for 270–290 words to allow deeper argumentation.