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Question: In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
In today's competitive market, many businesses focus on promoting their products as new or innovative. There are several reasons for this trend, and in this essay I will discuss them. In my opinion, this development is both positive and negative depending on how it is used. One reason why companies emphasize newness is to attract customers. Consumers are often attracted to products that are described as new because they assume that these products are better or more advanced than older versions. For example, tech companies like Apple release new smartphone models every year, even if the improvements over previous models are very small. This strategy makes the products seem modern and better, which can boost sales. Additionally, in a saturated market, businesses neededneed to make difference in differentiate their products from competitors by highlighting unique features or upgrades. This helphelps them significantly to attract more consumers for thiertheir products. This trend has both benefits and drawbacks. On the positive side, the emphasis on newness leadleads to competition and innovation. Companies try to do better than outperform each other by developing better products, which eventually benefits consumers. However, there are drawbacks to this trend. By constantly seeking newness, companies risk encouraging unnecessary product upgrades and waste. Many people end up buying things they do not really need, leading to waste and environmental damage. For instance, electronic waste havehas become a major global issue because people throw away old devices too quickly. Moreover, focusing solely on newness might distract businesses from addressing other important aspects such as quality or sustainability. In conclusion, the tendency of businesses to highlight newness in advertising is due to a saturated market and technological growth. While it promotes innovation and competitiveness, it also contributes to overconsumption and waste. Therefore, I believe this trend has both positive and negative aspects and should be managed carefully.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
In today's competitive market, many businesses focus on promoting their products as new or innovative. There are several reasons for this trend, and in this essay I will discuss them. In my opinion, this development is both positive and negative depending on how it is used.
In today's competitive market, many businesses focus on promoting their products as new or innovative. There are several reasons for this trend, and this essay will discuss them. In my view, this development has both positive and negative implications depending on its implementation.
One reason why companies emphasize newness is to attract customers. Consumers are often attracted to products that are described as new because they assume that these products are better or more advanced than older versions. For example, tech companies like Apple release new smartphone models every year, even if the improvements over previous models are very small. This strategy makes the products seem modern and better, which can boost sales. Additionally, in saturated market, businesses needed to make difference in their products from competitors by highlighting unique features or upgrades. This help them significantly to attract more consumers for thier products.
One reason companies emphasize newness is to attract customers. Consumers are often drawn to products marketed as new, assuming they are superior or more advanced than previous versions. For instance, technology firms like Apple release annual smartphone updates, even with minimal improvements, to maintain a perception of modernity and superiority, thereby increasing sales. Furthermore, in saturated markets, businesses need to differentiate their products from competitors by highlighting unique features or upgrades, which significantly helps attract more consumers.
This trend has both benefits and drawbacks. On the positive side, the emphasis on newness lead to competition and innovation. Companies try to do better than each other by developing better products, which eventually benefits consumers. However, there are drawbacks to this trend. By constantly seeking newness, companies risk encouraging unnecessary product upgrades and waste. Many people end up buying things they do not really need, leading to waste and environmental damage. For instance, electronic waste have become a major global issue because people throw away old devices too quickly. Moreover, focusing solely on newness might distract businesses from addressing other important aspects such as quality or sustainability.
This trend presents both advantages and disadvantages. On the positive side, the focus on innovation fosters competition, driving companies to develop better products that ultimately benefit consumers. However, there are notable drawbacks. The constant pursuit of newness may encourage unnecessary upgrades and wasteful consumption. Many consumers purchase items they do not genuinely need, contributing to environmental degradation through increased waste. Electronic waste, for example, has become a pressing global issue due to the rapid disposal of outdated devices. Additionally, an excessive emphasis on novelty might divert attention from crucial factors like product quality and sustainability.
In conclusion, the tendency of businesses to highlight newness in advertising is due to saturated market and technological growth. While it promotes innovation and competitiveness, it also contributes to overconsumption and waste. Therefore, I believe this trend has both positive and negative aspects and should be managed carefully.
In conclusion, businesses highlight product newness due to market saturation and technological advancement. While this practice stimulates innovation and competition, it also promotes overconsumption and environmental harm. Thus, I believe this trend has dual effects and requires careful management to maximize benefits while minimizing negative consequences.
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Overall Band Score
7.5
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
average
Grammar Accuracy
average
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
strong
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Here is your feedback based on IELTS writing criteria:

Task Achievement

  • The essay addresses the prompt effectively, discussing why businesses emphasize newness and evaluating whether it is positive or negative.
  • The response is well-developed with clear explanations and relevant examples (e.g., Apple’s product releases, electronic waste).
  • The conclusion summarizes the main points and presents a balanced view, fulfilling the task requirements.
  • Minor grammatical errors (e.g., "businesses needed" → "businesses need," "lead" → "leads") do not significantly hinder clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay is logically structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
  • Ideas are well-connected, though some transitions could be smoother (e.g., "Additionally, in saturated market" could be reworded for better flow).
  • Paragraphing is appropriate, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the argument.
  • Some awkward phrasing (e.g., "This help them significantly" → "This helps them significantly") slightly affects cohesion.

Lexical Resource

  • Vocabulary is generally appropriate and varied (e.g., "competitive market," "saturated market," "overconsumption").
  • Some word choices could be more precise (e.g., "make difference" → "differentiate").
  • Minor spelling errors (e.g., "thier" → "their") and informal phrasing (e.g., "do better than each other") slightly reduce lexical sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • A mix of simple and complex sentence structures is used, demonstrating grammatical range.
  • Several errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., "lead" → "leads," "have" → "has") and tense consistency ("needed" → "need") are present.
  • Articles and prepositions are occasionally missing or misused (e.g., "in saturated market" → "in a saturated market").

Suggestions for Improvement

  • Proofread for grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and tense consistency.
  • Refine transitions between ideas for smoother coherence (e.g., "Moreover, focusing solely on newness..." could be linked more explicitly to the previous point).
  • Replace informal phrasing with more academic alternatives (e.g., "do better than each other" → "outperform competitors").

Overall, the essay is well-structured and addresses the prompt effectively, but grammatical and lexical errors slightly reduce its clarity and sophistication. With minor refinements, it would meet higher IELTS standards.