Question: In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all ov...
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These days in different countries, customers have the opportunity to buy food products whichthat were produced all over the world by going to supermarketsupermarkets. Although it has some disadvantages, I believe it is a positive trend because of expandthe expansion in dietary choices and economic growth.
First and foremost, Somesome consider that having access to international foods is a beneficial development because it can lead to broadenbroader dietary choices and economic growth. That is to say, the more options ofinternational food products a person has, the more choices that person has for histheir diet. Rather than being limited to local produce, they might explore new tastes from overseas. Moreover, sharing food with other countries can lead to an improvement in the economic conditions. In other words, exporting food products can supportssupport farmers, and also creatscreate different job positions including transport systemsystems and trade markets. Hence, it causes enhancmentenhancement in the economy of a country. For example, since Iran started to export its vegtablesvegetables to other countries, it could creatcreate thousands of jobs for its citizens such as workers for transporting and employees for selling goods. Therefore, it can improve its economy.
On the other hand, accessibility to international foods has some demerits including environmental impacts and damage to local businesses. To begin with, Transportingtransporting food from distant locations contributes to increased pollution, exacerbating climate change and environmental degradation. Additionally, when people have access to world wide worldwidefoods, they reluctantly buy locally-produced foods. According to recent studies, the percentage of consumers of local foods dropped by 30% in 2024.
On balance., although wide spreadthe widespread availability of international foods can lead to climate changeschange and damage to local businesses, it is a positive development. This is because of economic growth and more dietary options.
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Task Achievement
Strengths: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of having access to international foods in supermarkets. It provides a clear opinion that this is a positive development, supported by reasons such as expanded dietary choices and economic growth.
Areas for Improvement: The essay could benefit from a more balanced discussion. While it mentions the disadvantages, these points are not as thoroughly developed as the advantages. Providing more detailed examples or evidence for the negative aspects could strengthen the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Strengths: The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The use of linking words and phrases (e.g., "First and foremost," "Moreover," "On the other hand") helps to guide the reader through the argument.
Areas for Improvement: The transition between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing economic benefits to environmental impacts could be more clearly signposted. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive by summarizing the key points discussed in the essay.
Lexical Resource
Strengths: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with terms like "dietary choices," "economic growth," "environmental impacts," and "local businesses."
Areas for Improvement: There are some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as "creats" instead of "creates" and "enhancment" instead of "enhancement." Paying attention to these details can improve the overall quality of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Strengths: The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences, which demonstrates a good command of grammar.
Areas for Improvement: There are a few grammatical errors, such as "Some consider that having access to international foods is a beneficial development because it can lead to broaden dietary choices and economic growth." This could be corrected to "Some consider that having access to international foods is beneficial because it broadens dietary choices and promotes economic growth." Additionally, ensure subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles.
Overall Impression
The essay effectively addresses the prompt and presents a clear opinion. To enhance the response, focus on providing a more balanced discussion with detailed examples for both sides of the argument. Additionally, pay attention to minor grammatical and lexical errors to improve clarity and precision.