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Question: Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines...

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In recent decades, most people hashave become interested in home remedies to cure their health issues instead of visiting their doctors. While this situation can be beneficial to save money and time, in my view, the drawbacks, such as not the widespreading the diseasedisease spreading, have brought more significant consequences. On one hand, the trend of curing health issues at home becomeshas become common among individuals. This can be considered a negative situation due to several reasons. Firstly, people have to undrestandunderstand that doctors and related professionals hadhave studied their subjects for more than six years, therefore they have an essential knowledge to dignosediagnose and use the best treatment for them, and also they are aware of the advancements in medicensmedicine. There for Therefore, visiting doctors is always is a the best solution to cure the health-related problems. In addition, patients often, in their homes, take their old medicines, which it might be expired, or home remedies, such as drinking lemeonlemon with honey and hot water, as their main treatmetstreatments. In fact, these mentioned alternative treatments can be effective besidesalongside the doctor’s prescription. As a result, if their illness can not cannot be cured, more people will get the virus from them. On the other hand, others argue that, by using the remedies at home, there are more advantages for us. The most important one is saving a reasonable amount of money. They belivebelieve that doctors always instruct us to take extra tests or medicines, leading to spending a lot of money that we cancould use them in a better way. For example, instead of spending money on unessentialunnecessary tests, people can buy useful products for their children. At the same time, most parents believe that they can save their valuable time to be more productive in their lives. For instantinstance, if they do not waste their time in waiting rooms, they can spend time with their children. In conclusion, in the modern world, more people have been encouraged to use home remedies and the traditional treatments at their homes and refusingrefuse to visit their doctors. Although this situation carries certain advantages, like people can save their time to do their favouritsfavourite tasks, I assert that it represents a negative developmentsdevelopment due to its potential drawbacks, including disease becomediseases becoming widespread among others.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
In recent decades, most people has become interested in home remedies to cure their health issues instead of visiting their doctors. While this situation can beneficial to save money and time, in my view, the drawbacks, such as not the widespreading the disease, have brought more significant consequences.
In recent decades, most people have become interested in home remedies to treat their health issues instead of visiting doctors. While this trend can be beneficial for saving money and time, in my view, the drawbacks, such as the potential spread of disease, have more significant consequences.
On one hand, the trend of curing health issues at home becomes common among individuals. This can be considered a negative situation due to several reasons. Firstly, people have to undrestand that doctors and related professionals had studied their subjects for more than six years, therefore they have an essential knowledge to dignose and use the best treatment for them, and also they are aware of the advancements in medicens. There for visiting doctors always is a best solution to cure the health- related problems. In addition, patients often, in their homes, take their old medicines, which it might be expired, or home remedies, such as drinking lemeon with honey and hot water, as their main treatmets. In fact, these mentioned alternative treatments can be effective besides the doctor’s prescription. As a result, if their illness can not be cured, more people will get the virus from them.
On one hand, the trend of treating health issues at home has become common among individuals. This can be considered problematic for several reasons. Firstly, people must understand that doctors and medical professionals have studied their subjects for over six years, giving them essential knowledge to diagnose and provide the best treatments. They are also aware of advancements in medicine. Therefore, visiting doctors is always the best solution for health-related problems. In addition, patients often rely on old medicines at home, which may be expired, or use home remedies, such as lemon with honey and hot water, as their primary treatments. While these alternative treatments can be effective alongside a doctor’s prescription, relying solely on them may delay proper care. As a result, if their illness is not properly treated, they risk spreading infections to others.
On the other hand, others argue that, by using the remedies at home, there are more advantages for us. The most important one is saving a reasonable amount of money. They belive that doctors always instruct us to take extra tests or medicines, leading to spending a lot of money that we can use them in a better way. For example, instead of spending money on unessential tests, people can buy useful products for their children. At the same time, most parents believe that they can save their valuable time to be more productive in their lives. For instant, if they do not waste their time in waiting rooms, they can spend time with their children.
On the other hand, some argue that using home remedies has advantages. The most significant benefit is saving money. They believe doctors often recommend unnecessary tests or medications, leading to excessive expenses that could be better used elsewhere. For example, instead of spending on non-essential tests, people could buy useful products for their children. Additionally, many parents believe they can save valuable time and be more productive. For instance, avoiding long waits in clinics allows them to spend more time with their families.
In conclusion, in the modern world, more people have encouraged to use home remedies and the traditional treatments at their homes and refusing to visit their doctors. Although this situation carries certain advantages, like people can save their time to do their favourits tasks, I assert that it represents a negative developments due to its potential drawbacks, including disease become widespread among others.
In conclusion, in the modern world, more people are encouraged to use home remedies and traditional treatments instead of visiting doctors. Although this trend has certain advantages, such as saving time for personal tasks, I believe it represents a negative development due to its potential drawbacks, including the increased risk of disease transmission.
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Check your essay for this topic
Overall Band Score
5
Overview
Vocabulary Range
average
Linking Words
average
Spelling
weak
Grammar Accuracy
weak
Grammar Range
average
Cohesion
average
Paragraph Structure
average
Task Response
average
Word Count
sufficient
While we are confident in our score estimation, you are not guaranteed to receive the same score in an official test.

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Clarity of Position: Your stance is clear—you believe the trend is negative. However, the introduction could be more concise. The phrase "not the widespreading the disease" is unclear; consider rephrasing to "the risk of spreading diseases."
  • Supporting Arguments: You provide relevant points (e.g., doctors' expertise, risks of self-medication, financial savings). However, some arguments lack depth. For example, the claim that doctors always recommend unnecessary tests needs more evidence or examples.
  • Conclusion: Restates your position well but could be more impactful. Avoid minor errors like "negative developments" (should be "a negative development").

Coherence and Cohesion

  • Logical Flow: The essay is structured logically, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For example, "On the other hand, others argue..." could be introduced more naturally.
  • Paragraphing: Well-organized, but the second body paragraph (on advantages) is slightly weaker in argumentation.
  • Repetition: Some phrases are repeated (e.g., "save money and time" appears multiple times). Try to vary your wording.

Lexical Resource

  • Vocabulary Range: You use a mix of formal and informal language. Some words are misused ("undrestand" → "understand", "widespreading" → "spreading").
  • Word Choice: Avoid awkward phrasing like "most people has become interested" (should be "have become interested").
  • Spelling & Grammar Errors: Several errors affect clarity (e.g., "dignose" → "diagnose", "lemeon" → "lemon", "belive" → "believe").

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • Sentence Structure: Some sentences are overly complex or unclear (e.g., "patients often, in their homes, take their old medicines, which it might be expired" → "patients often take expired medicines at home").
  • Subject-Verb Agreement: Errors like "most people has" (should be "have") and "this situation can beneficial" (should be "can be beneficial") need correction.
  • Article Usage: Missing or incorrect articles (e.g., "a best solution" → "the best solution").

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Proofread Carefully: Fix spelling and grammar mistakes to improve clarity.
  2. Strengthen Arguments: Provide more concrete examples (e.g., statistics on self-medication risks).
  3. Improve Word Choice: Use more precise vocabulary (e.g., "alternative treatments" instead of "home remedies" in some cases).
  4. Vary Sentence Structure: Mix simple and complex sentences for better flow.

Overall, your essay presents a clear argument but would benefit from more precise language and stronger supporting details. Keep practicing!