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Question: In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all ov...

Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
There is a truth that, in today's world, people in all over the world have easy and instant access to purchase various types of food. In my opinion, although this trend can be highly beneficial for people, it also has its drawbacks. There are some reasons why easilyeasy access to food productionsproduction has benefits. Firstly, it offers greater variety and choices for consumers, whichwho are able to purchase a broader range of products from different cultures and cuisines. Secondly, foods that are seasonal in one part of the world can be available through the other parts of the world due to globalization and improvements in transportation. For example, in Iran, date is dates are a food which growthat grows in warm locations in the southestsoutheastern part of this country, although it isthey are easily accessableaccessible for norththe northern part of Iran. Moreover, exporting foods, especially certain rare crops, can have benefits viaby providing income, jobs, and in economiceconomic growth. Finally, with a larger selection of imported foods, prices may drop as a result of competotioncompetition between companies, which is profitable for people. Some people may think it has some demerits. For instance, shipping food globally can leadslead to a larger carbon footprint due to transportation, which contributecontributes to climate change. Additionally, easy access to foreign food may decrease interest in traditional, local foods, and impact on cultural heritage. Furthermore, dependency on international food sources could make countries vulnerable, if global chains are destroyeddisrupted, as seen during pandemics. In conclusion, nawadaysnowadays, people have easy access to foodsfood, which, in my opinion, its has positive effects is weight than that outweigh negative effects.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
There is a truth that, in today's world people in all over the world have easy and instant access to purchase various types of food. In my opinion, although this trend can be highly beneficial for people, it also has its drawbacks.
There is a truth that, in today's world, people all over the globe have easy and instant access to a wide variety of food. In my opinion, although this trend can be highly beneficial for individuals, it also has its drawbacks.
There are some reasons why easily access to food productions has benefits.Firstly, it offers greater variety and choices for consumers, which are able to purchase a broader range of products from different cultures and cuisines. Secondly, foods that are seasonal in one part of the world can be available through the other parts of world due to globalization and improvements in transportation. For example, in Iran date is a food which grow in warm locations in the southest part of this country, although it is easily accessable for north part of Iran. Moreover, exporting foods especially certain rare crops can have benefits via providing income, jobs, and in economic. Finally, with a larger selection of imported foods, prices may drop as a result of competotion between companies, which is profitable for people.
There are several reasons why easy access to food products is advantageous. Firstly, it offers greater variety and choice for consumers, allowing them to purchase a broader range of products from different cultures and cuisines. Secondly, foods that are seasonal in one part of the world can be available in other regions due to globalization and improvements in transportation. For example, in Iran, dates are grown in the warm southern regions of the country, yet they are easily accessible in the northern parts as well. Moreover, exporting foods, especially certain rare crops, can provide benefits by generating income, creating jobs, and boosting the economy. Finally, with a larger selection of imported foods, prices may decrease as a result of competition between companies, which is advantageous for consumers.
Some people may think it has some demerits. For instance, shipping food globally can leads to a larger carbon footprint due to transportation, which contribute to climate change. Additionally, easy access to foreign food may decrease interest in traditional, local foods, and impact on cultural heritage. Furthermore, dependency on international food sources could make countries vulnerable, if global chains are destroyed, as seen during pandemics.
However, some people may argue that there are demerits to this trend. For instance, shipping food globally can lead to a larger carbon footprint due to transportation, which contributes to climate change. Additionally, easy access to foreign foods may decrease interest in traditional, local cuisines, thereby impacting cultural heritage. Furthermore, dependency on international food sources could make countries vulnerable if global supply chains are disrupted, as seen during pandemics.
In conclusion, nawadays people have easy access to foods, which in my opinion its positive effects is weight than negative effects.
In conclusion, nowadays, people have easy access to a variety of foods, which, in my opinion, has more positive effects than negative ones.
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Overall Band Score
6
Overview
Vocabulary Range
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Linking Words
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Grammar Accuracy
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Grammar Range
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Cohesion
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Task Response
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Word Count
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Task Achievement

  • Response to the Prompt: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of having access to a global variety of foods in supermarkets. However, the conclusion could be more explicit in stating whether the development is overall positive or negative, as the final sentence is somewhat unclear.
  • Examples and Support: The essay provides examples, such as the availability of dates in Iran, to support the points made. However, more specific examples or data could strengthen the argument further.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • Structure and Organization: The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the argument. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother. For instance, using linking words like "on the other hand" or "in contrast" could help in transitioning between the positive and negative aspects.
  • Logical Flow: The essay generally follows a logical flow, but the introduction could be more engaging, and the conclusion should clearly restate the main argument.

Lexical Resource

  • Vocabulary: The essay uses a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as "globalization," "transportation," and "carbon footprint." However, there are some awkward phrases and word choices, such as "easily accessable" which should be "easily accessible."
  • Word Choice: Some word choices are incorrect or awkward, such as "demerits" which is less commonly used in this context. Consider using "drawbacks" or "disadvantages" instead.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • Sentence Structure: The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentences, but some sentences are awkwardly constructed or contain grammatical errors. For example, "in today's world people in all over the world" should be "in today's world, people all over the world."
  • Grammar and Punctuation: There are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ("the" before "other parts of world") and incorrect verb forms ("is weight" should be "outweighs"). Punctuation errors, such as missing commas, also affect readability.

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Clarify the Conclusion: Make sure the conclusion clearly states whether the development is positive or negative overall.
  2. Improve Transitions: Use more cohesive devices to improve the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
  3. Enhance Vocabulary: Use more precise vocabulary and avoid awkward phrases.
  4. Check Grammar and Punctuation: Proofread the essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure.

By addressing these areas, the essay can be more coherent, persuasive, and aligned with the IELTS writing criteria.